Helping mothers + daughters find renewed trust + reconnection.
You’re both hurting.
You don’t feel like you are being heard.
Mom feels like she is being constantly rejected or blamed. She’s not feeling cared for. But she is also trying her best. She doesn’t know how to do it any differently. She feels like she is walking on egg shells. This is not how their relationship used to be. She feels like she doesn’t know how to mother an adult daughter. What she hears is the word “boundary” but what she feels is the distance.
Daughter is frustrated. Years of not feeling understood has built up a wall. She doesn’t know how to help her mother understand what she needs. She feels guilty that she isn’t able to meet her mother’s needs. She tries to communicate but doesn’t feel like her mother listens or changes. She would like a closer relationship with her mother but doesn’t know how to make that happen.
Hi, I’m Trish.
And I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be this way.
Trust me. I’ve seen it. Both as a therapist for 15+ years and a certified Mother and Daughter Coach.
I’ve seen years of tension and resentment between a mother and daughter dissolve quickly when focused, loving attention is placed on the relationship.
I’ve thought to myself, “why hasn’t this happened sooner?”
We try to figure these things out on our own but sometimes without guidance, those attempts just spiral into conflict.
But imagine if it could be different.
Imagine if you could enjoy each other again.
Imagine if you could trust each other again?
To be relaxed in each other’s company, instead of walking on egg shells or burning with quiet resentment and tension.
That is why I’m here.
I’m here to give you back the relationship that means so much to you. To offer a space for healing and untangling the threads of miscommunication. I want you to help you both truly see and understand each other - and to have a sense of belonging again in each other’s lives.
Introducing…..
Mother + Daughter Intensives
Short-term therapeutic experiences designed to expedite healing and deeper conversations between mothers and daughters. Together we deepen your understanding of one another, strengthen your connection, and find authentic closeness again in your relationship.
Why intensives?
I’ve seen too many important conversations - painful conversations - get started in a session but not finished because the “session is over.”
Mother and daughter will be at the precipice of something important, something new between them, only to be interrupted by time.
You deserve better than that.
This relationship is complex. And it deserves attention.
I’ve seen mothers and daughters try to fit this vulnerable work into the middle of a stressful workday. It’s a lot to ask of yourself - to suddenly put your defenses down, tap into a deep place, and then hop back in a work meeting.
Intensives also save you time and help you get to the heart of the matter quickly.
What I have noticed, from years of experience, is that open-ended sessions (with no end-date in mind) can dilute the intention and focus of the work. Time tends to be wasted. I would rather our time together be intentional, focused, consistent, and potent.
You may want to resolve issues before a big event, like a wedding, or big transitions like motherhood, or moving away, or starting college.
You can go to weekly sessions that drag on forever and barely touch the surface or you can get to the heart of things now and make way for breakthroughs.
Intensives are an intentional space where both of you can deepen into the places that are really needing to be understood and to share those places with each other.
How It Works
Complete the Application: Access the application here.
Initial Phone Consultation: We will then set up a phone consultation where I speak with each of you separately to assess what is happening in your relationship and what is possibly causing conflict. We get clear on what you would like to focus on in the Intensive.
Choose Your Intensive: We will assess whether we are a good fit in working together in a coaching format, and if an intensive will be a good fit. We determine which Intensive format works best for you or if we need to customize something for you.
Mother Daughter Mapping Sessions: If your intensive includes a Mother Daughter Map, you will receive a 90min. mapping session for each of you. This is visual exercise that takes place live in session (albeit virtually). I describe this mapping in more detail further down this page. See below.
Mapping Pre-Work: You will receive the Mother Daughter Mapping Pre-Work for you to complete prior to our mapping session.
Scheduling: After we commit to working together, we will schedule the virtual sessions for the Intensive and the Mother Daughter Mapping sessions (if applicable).
Personalized Relationship Workbook: This will be my personalized summary of the work we did together. It will include important needs that were named, important insights to remember about our time together, and strategies for going forward.
What is Mother Daughter Mapping?
Our first priority will be mapping each of your Mother/Daughter maps where each of you are the daughter in your own map. We will map out the generational patterns around emotional neglect, unspoken needs, and suppressed emotions as it relates to the women in your family lineage and the men in their lives. We explore how these patterns contribute to your mother/daughter conflict so as to soften the lens from which you both view yourselves and each other. I will work with each of you individually to draw your map. Our session will be recorded and shared with your mother/daughter so they can learn about your experience as a daughter.
CENTERS WOMEN: A mother/daughter mapping session centers the emotional experience of the 3 primary women in your family lineage: daughter, mother, grandmother Each of you are the daughter in your own map. We aim to understand their lives, circumstances, and emotional realities.
PRE-WORK: You will receive the instructions for pre-work that involve gathering facts about these women, including the dates of their birth, # of siblings, age upon which they married or had children, and the gender limitations and expectations that defined their lives.
90 MIN MAPPING SESSIONS: We don’t rush this. Each of you will have your own 90-minute mapping session. During the 90min+ mapping session, we will break down the emotional realities and relationships of the women in your family, including your own. This is a visual experience where I chart your map live (albeit virtually) in front of you. By doing so, we begin to see the patterns that get passed down through the generations.
RECORDED: The mapping session is recorded and shared with each other, so that you both can get a glimpse into each other’s realities and perspectives. You can then see the similarities you share as daughters and be offered an opportunity to see your mothers as women, first.
CLARITY + PATH TO CHANGE: By clearly identifying the patterns and their repercussions, we chart a path to change for both mother daughter.
SOFTER PERSPECTIVES: The map will offer you softer eyes from which you see yourself, your daughter, and perhaps even your own mother and invites you go forward in your life, honoring your needs, feelings, and voice in the world.
How I Help:
Together we unpack hurtful moments or miscommunication that has occurred in your relationship. We give your relationship an opportunity to repair so that trust between you can be strengthened. Learning how to repair will also be central to our work as you will not always “get it right” in your new relationship.
I help both of you really see each other. This means unpacking projections and rewriting old narratives. This means seeing your mother as a woman, separate from the lens of your unmet needs. This means seeing your daughter as person separate from you - not as a source for your own needs nor a source of rejection.
I help you both get clear about what you are wanting and needing from this relationship not just from the “boundary” perspective, but from a place that honors both of your needs and voices in the relationship.
This is not about taking the long walk of shame - although it might be a painful journey at times. It’s about learning. It’s about learning how to listen and learning how to respond in a new way with a new language. There is a lot of compassion available here for the new emotional language mothers are being asked to learn in order to meet the emotional needs of their daughter. I help you learn this language.
I help you both get better at feeling connected. There is a lot of compassion available here for the daughter who must learn how to open again to her mother’s love - imperfect as it may be. Both of you may be learning how to trust each other again.
I help you identify your emotional needs and learn how to meet them (and communicate them) in new ways. Together we can understand places where you might get activated and pulled back into old ways of responding - and help you recover more quickly.
Co-create the kind of relationship you both deeply long for.
Ok, I have more questions.
What if we don’t want an “intensive”?
I work with mothers and daughters to customize the experience they are looking for. I offer 3-session packages (90min. each) that you can schedule when you wish.
How can I know if a particular intensive will be enough time?
Every person and mother-daughter couple are different, and it is hard to assess how long your work will take as it is dependent on how quickly you can facilitate the change you desire. Within each Intensive, I offer 90-120min session times to give us ample time to both unpack important feelings and resolve them. I ensure there is enough time in each session for both of you to feel heard and for conversations to be started and completed.
I believe that when we put our focus and attention on something in a concentrated and dedicated way, change occurs. I am vey intentional in offering this work as a container rather than open-ended sessions. I believe a focused, committed container lends itself to transformation. What we focus on changes.
What if we need more time?
I customized the Intensives to accommodate the different rhythms of people’s lives. For those who wish to put focus into the relationship for a shorter period of time, there are 3-day or month-long Intensives. For those who wish to take their time, the 3-month container is a wonderful option and offers the added support of Voxer coaching with me. No matter which intensive you choose, you will have the option to extend our work together with ala carte intensive packages.
What does the voice messaging look like?
The 3-month Intensive utilizes Voxer, which is an application where you can reach out to me and leave a voice memo (as many as you would like). You can leave messages at any time of day or night and I check Voxer daily to respond. Voice messaging is a place for you to reach out to me and your use of this space is dependent on you. However, on occasion, if I feel called to share an insight or thought, I will initiate a message to you.
Is it possible to add on Voxer support?
Yes. I provide Voxer coaching for mothers or daughters who wish to have me in their back pocket when conflicts arise or to support them in responding differently in day-to-day interactions. Voxer coaching can be added on a monthly basis. I support mothers in continuing to break old response patterns, shift their perspective in the moment, and continue practicing the new communication skills they are wanting to lead with in the relationship. I also help daughters work through the emotions that can arise as they also practice boundary-setting, emotional differentiation, and moving past anxiety to lean into the relationship in a new way.
How will this coaching in-between sessions (via Voxer) be helpful?
I find it helpful for both mother and daughter to have me as a touchstone in-between sessions to continue integrating the takeaways from the coaching sessions. While our time in session will undoubtedly be powerful, it is the time in-between sessions where we can slide back into old ways of thinking and reacting.
The voice messaging between sessions also offers you a place to vent and to process further what is coming up for you in the session. It is a place for you to feel heard and supported while you are learning how to hear each other. And other times, it is to ask more questions or get more coaching around things coming up for you that are hard to move past. I will hold your feelings, while also gently bringing you back to center and back to your intention around the relationship. You will have my help uncovering your own needs from the feelings that are being evoked. And you will have my support shifting out of negative mindsets or perspectives that are keeping you locked in the same patterns of interpreting and reacting to your mother/daughter dynamic.
What beloved clients have shared:
I just wanted to drop you a note to thank you for putting me and my daughter back together again. We have really grown in trust and respect for each other and we couldn’t have done it without you. Because of unforeseen family circumstances, I lived with my daughter and her husband for two months to help them through a difficult time. My daughter and I both thought of you and how thankful we were that you put us back together again so we were able to be there for each other in a very scary time. We just love you.— client
“Your support of us has meant so much to both of us. I honestly could never thank you enough for the gift of relationship you are giving us.” — client
Thank you again for yet another insightful and meaningful session. Each time you bring us to a conversation that needs to happen that moves aside the blocks and brings us closer. — client
“You have been so most impactful in our lives and relationships, I’m forever grateful.” - client
“We are both extremely grateful for your professional and experienced guidance through our emotional minefield. You felt like an invested partner in seeing us into a healthy, trusting and more loving relationship. You were fair, never judgmental, and always supportive to both of us. We just can't say enough good things about our experience working with you.” - client
“Your guidance has been so impactful it feels hard to capture in words.” - client
You are perfect for this if you:
Are genuinely curious and ready to learn what is needed to make your relationship feel better to both of you.
Are genuinely ready to listen to one another.
Are genuinely curious and ready to understand each other’s emotional experience - even if it differs from or contradicts your own.
Are genuinely curious and ready to understand yourself more, including understanding your own emotional needs and how to meet them.
Are genuinely invested in growing as a person, in creating a roadmap for emotional empowerment, and generational healing.
There is a way back to each other.
Together we will find it.
Are you interested but not ready to make the leap? Sign up below so we can stay connected.
(I promise not to inundate you with useless sales emails but rather honest reflections and insights about the mother/daughter relationship.)